Brave Little Hitachi Wand

At the board meeting, I want to hear when they decided to broadcast that they’re expecting to get sued, but in a really cute way

That can’t be right, no bank could be so evil

All the compound interest calculators on websites refuse to go over 100 years so I guess I’ll just take the 5 mil 😭

We’ve all heard talk about “hybrid warfare” and how Russian intelligence has done some amazing thing in the last decade, but it really is just “promote bad leaders to break democracies abroad”. Statecraft is so much easier when you can pick your own adversaries.

That’s not what I’ve heard

Still manageable tbh

Exactly, the problem isn’t I’m being naughty or whatever, it’s just that my focus can be quite irregular so I’m always either taking a mild breather (and feeling irrationally guilty about it) or hyperfocused on my work and going at 2-3x normal speed, so there’s really never a great time to surprise me.

My current setup is positioned sideways to the door and a window, because otherwise I’d have the same issue. Like so:

My home office was like that for a year, hated it. Now I’ve got it just how I want it, giant desk facing a door which stands atop a staircase. I can sense any approach from anywhere in the house. Only way to improve from here would be if I had Saruman’s digs.

I really don’t like being sneaked up on.

I was just being a bit of a smartass with you, I know you meant well

Chat, what kind of equivalency is this

Twice.

Twice I have had to deal with open office layouts where my-

Still angry about this, gimme a sec.

My desk was facing THE WALL.

I bit into a whole onion once. I peeled the skin first though, which tells you there must have been some insane part of me that expected to enjoy the experience. “Hang on, get that paper off first or it’ll taste bad”? What was I thinking.

Thank fucking god, it’s been a minute since I heard anything that makes sense from this government

I harbour a conviction that charisma is largely a skill, but being extroverted makes it easier to acquire. One of my best friends is a prom king daredevil life of the party type, but I know him pretty well after 3 decades. He’s bipolar, extroverted, and knows exactly the way to put up a front that will get people in a party mood - which is something he only does during a manic phase. When the high gives way to the low, he turns into more of the spooky enigmatic recluse type. The trick is to befriend both.

Yeah it sounds cool but I use the mech to update spreadsheets

Yak Bak

“Speaking ill of the dead”? What am I, Edgar Allen Poe? No, the kids are calling it cold goss.

Two years ago I bought one pair of shoelaces from a website that looked like the old internet. It was fucking great.

I can hear it now. My kid’s generation is gonna be giving each other shit like "wait, you bought this off a website? Like a millennial?"

itch.io

Henrycavill.meme