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Cake day: August 2nd, 2023

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  • The solution to social phobia isn’t to design your life around avoiding people. It’s fine if you prefer to spend time alone, but it’s important to be able to tolerate even the experiences you dislike the most. I might feel great suffering when I have to do math, but it’s important that I’m able to do some basic calculations when I have to.

    It sounds like your aversion to being around people is causing some serious disruptions in important parts of your life, like eating meals. I promise that continuing to avoid people will not make the problem go away. I’m a big advocate for therapy. It might sound impossible to you since it involves talking to someone for extended periods of time, but therapists are there to listen without judgement, and to help you have an easier time in life.






  • Therapist here. The concept of a “real depressed person” is brought to you by insurance companies (so they can deny coverage), the APA (so they can sell the DSM) and big pharma (so they can sell you drugs). The criteria are arbitrary and often discourage people from seeking help when they don’t think their suffering is “real enough.” Most therapists I know hate the diagnostic process, but we’re forced to do it so your insurance will pay for treatment.

    Anyone who’s feeling depression that disrupts their lives is welcome to see a psychiatrist, or a therapist, or both. Both types of providers are here to help, and we’ll refer you to any additional providers if it’s appropriate.

    Edit: for a deeper dive into the over-pathologizing of human experiences, I recommend Allen Frances’ Saving Normal and Ethan Watters’ Crazy Like Us. The latter has a chapter on GlaxoSmithKline’s crusade to change Japan’s cultural understanding of depression from a natural response to external events, to a pervasive disease that needs treatment (like Paxil!)











  • I know someone who just got hired at an unfinished Meta data center, ostensibly to do some low-level hardware monitoring and maintenance. His boss admitted that he accidentally hired people a couple months too early, so the first couple weeks have consisted of sitting around, eating free food and playing mobile games. Next week they’re being flown to an active data center out of state, but they won’t have much of their own work to do for another 4-6 weeks.

    So these guys are being paid $25/hr, 40hrs a week, with a free lunch, and making no money for the company. I would expect any other company to find this unacceptable, but it’s just a drop in the bucket for Meta.